i'm a pixel here, myself

In my head the interview goes something like this:

[start of interview]

Jared: Blah blah blah, AND THEN I MASTURBATE FOR AN HOUR.
Jensen: [raises eyebrow]
Jared: ...or two. FINE, OR THREE.
Jensen: And then...
Jared: Don't make me say it.
Interviewer: [stunned] Say what?
Jared: I masturbate for another hour.
Jensen: What was that, Jare?
Jared: I MASTURBATE FOR ANOTHER HOUR.
Jensen: [smug]
Jared: Yeah, well tell her about how you don't believe in UNDERWEAR, Naked Boy.
Jensen: Hey, why lock it up when you're at home?
Jared: I don't know you.
Jensen: A man's cock is a beautiful thing; don't cage the beast.
Interviewer: [opening and closing mouth with no sound coming out]
Jared: Oh, please, like you have such a MAN'S cock.
Jensen: Hey, it's no ten-inch monster like yours, but it does the job perfectly well.
Jared: [eyeroll]
Jensen: Aw, baby, don't be mad just because you like to whack off a lot.
Interviewer: [dies]
Jensen and Jared: Blah, blah, blah.

[end of interview]